How I Cured My BV Through My Relationship
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By: Aryssa Rodriguez, M.S., OTR/L, PCES
“Sometimes it just takes a few rounds,” my OBGYN said gently, placing yet another prescription in my hand—for that same gel I’d grown to hate, the one I’d have to use again and again.
Despite MetroGel being a standard treatment for BV, I felt isolated, like I was the only one relying on it. I nodded, holding back the heaviness in my chest, already bracing for the next cycle.
Why Bacterial Vaginosis Keeps Coming Back
For some reason the only time my BV decided to make itself known was at the worst possible moments- right as my husband and I started having sex. Although he was sweet and tried reassuring me I didn’t stink, I thought I smelled repulsive and he was only trying to make me feel better. Of all the humiliation I had ever experienced in my life, this was the worst. I would end up silently crying at the end of our intimate sessions, cursing my body, wondering what the hell was wrong with me and why I was so unlucky.
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At the time, I was completely wrapped up in the medical world—working as a neuro occupational therapist at a rehab hospital, totally bought into science, evidence, and everything that came with it. I trusted the system. I trusted my doctor. Honestly, it would’ve taken something pretty major to make me even consider she might be wrong.
Natural Remedies and the Mind-Body Connection for BV
But one day, I decided enough was enough. The gels, the pills, the vague reassurances—they weren’t working, so I started doing my own research. Late at night, at work, down internet rabbit holes—trying to make sense of what was happening to my body when no one else seemed to help. I discovered amazing natural remedies like coconut oil and many of the ingredients Momotaro Apotheca uses (only the company didn’t exist back then and the topic was still pretty taboo). Once I discovered these alternative remedies and that they didn’t have the same detrimental effects as antibiotics, I never went back to the OBGYN for my BV again. Still, the issue lingered—just less intensely.
Sex became less and less frequent. I dodged it like it was poison, always armed with an excuse: I’m exhausted, my head’s pounding, I probably stink again—anything to avoid facing it. The cycle of embarrassment and shame felt suffocating.
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Then one day, I realized I had been hiding from the elephant in the room—the real issues my husband and I were avoiding, the dissatisfaction simmering beneath the surface of our marriage.
I grew up in a turbulent household filled with yelling and fighting. I never wanted my kids to go through that, so I put on a happy face every day and avoided conflict at all costs while my body suffered the consequences. I didn’t understand that healthy disagreement is actually a normal—and necessary—part of a strong relationship.
Whenever my husband did something that upset me, I’d make an excuse, shrink myself, and push down my feelings. Over and over.
The details of that are beyond the scope of this article, but something incredible happened when I finally decided to face the problems head-on: the infections stopped. Sex became a way to connect again.
To his credit, my husband was incredibly supportive during this time—patient, open, and genuinely willing to work through our issues with me. As we healed our relationship, my body healed too. My vagina was trying to protect me all along. I realized she wasn’t just a source of pain—she was sending me a message.
This was the very beginning of my journey into understanding mind-body medicine. My body forced me to start healing my relationship—not through gentle nudges, but through the most glaring, painful, and embarrassing symptom I could imagine. It was a wake-up call I couldn’t ignore.
How Stress and Relationships Impact Vaginal Health
Naturally, my science brain kicked in—I needed to understand why this was happening. That’s when I came across some eye opening information and even a study done on women like me! The research I did confirmed that increased psychosocial stress is linked to higher rates of bacterial vaginosis [1]. Even without the usual risk factors, stress alone can throw things off. And honestly, it made perfect sense—my relationship at the time was incredibly stressful. Of course my body was going to respond to that. Stress doesn’t just live in your head; it affects your immune system, your hormones, and even the balance of bacteria in your vagina. No wonder everything felt out of sync.
Better understand stress and its affects on the body
When it comes to the mind-body connection, there’s no one-size-fits-all formula. Your body is like a personal oracle, speaking a language only you can truly understand. Every symptom you experience is deeply tied to your unique life story, your emotions, your experiences. While medical tests and providers offer valuable insights, understanding the root cause often requires tuning into your own inner world.
The real work lies within—taking a brave, honest look at your life and asking yourself: Where are these symptoms coming from? What part of my life are they trying to protect or warn me about? What are they stopping me from doing?
In my case, the symptoms were slowly destroying my relationship and my intimacy. I had to ask myself: When did these symptoms first appear? What was happening in my life at that time?
Understanding this connection gave me the power to begin healing—not just my body, but my heart and my marriage. It showed me that true healing starts from within, by listening carefully to the messages your body sends and responding with compassion and courage.
About the Author: Aryssa Rodriguez is a holistic pelvic floor therapist, Reiki master, breathwork facilitator, and unapologetic advocate for embodied pleasure. She is passionate about supporting women who are tired of dealing with numbness or pain during sex and are ready to actually feel again- physically and emotionally. She is a firm believer in mind-body medicine, nervous system repair, and the kind of deep, holistic work that gets to the root of what’s going on. To explore her offerings, visit thepelvicoracle.com or follow along on Instagram @thepelvicoracle.
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References:
1. Nansel, T. R., Riggs, M. A., Yu, K. F., Andrews, W. W., Schwebke, J. R., & Klebanoff, M. A. (2006). The association of psychosocial stress and bacterial vaginosis in a longitudinal cohort. American journal of obstetrics and gynecology, 194(2), 381–386. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.ajog.2005.07.047